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My brother's death has affected me to an extent that I really hadn't expected. We weren't close emotionally because of the spread in our ages (he was 60 - that's 26 years older than me); but perhaps that's part of why it is affecting me so much. That, and all the other stuff related to the circumstances of his death. Suffice it to say that this situation really has me thinking about how I want to live my life, what I need to do to turn that out, and how I do and don't want to die. Then I start contemplating meaning... I mean, really What is the meaning of life? It's all very unsettling. :(
In a few hours, I'll be en route to Houston for the family memorial service. I'm looking forward to the celebration part... but my big family gatherings are always exhausting events. Our mom, plus at least 7 of the kids, their spouses, and probably 8 - 10 grandkids, along with a few of the greatgrandkids will be in attendance, at least. Despite the fact that I'm a gregarious and outspoken person, I can be easily overwhelmed within a room full of my kinsfolk. Really, I'm relatively tame & staid in comparison!
Labels: family